Thursday, August 11, 2011
I remember. It was a Thursday exactly six years ago. We'd finally secured a permanent job for the husband just two weeks prior and had gotten a "new" car given to us by a generous family in our church after our others had been totaled-one by a drunk driver hit-and-run, the other by a careless out of town driver. We had packed our apartment and were ready to move on my husband's 26th birthday-the next day.
Six years ago I was on the brink of motherhood. I was bursting with child, scared, moving to a new town, tired from packing every single belonging we owned into boxes and unsure of what the future would hold.
And then at my last doctor's visit that very Thursday, I found out that the precious little boy inside had turned around. As in, he flipped footling breech and I would not be able to have the natural birth I had really wanted.
And on that Thursday six years ago, the reality of impending parenthood hit hard as we were told he'd be coming via c-section the next morning. His Daddy's birthday. Our moving day. My in-law's anniversary. Now our little one's birthday.
A few tears sprang to my eyes this morning as I remembered those moments. So much has happened since that day.
We grew from two to three then. Now we are six.
We were afraid. We were broken. We were vulnerable and unsure of how things would turn out. But amidst these fears, God gave us the grace needed to do what needed to be done in the face of our fears.
He gave us the courage to be brave. Not that we weren't afraid of all of the changes but, that we could face the unknown and keep walking. That's bravery anyway. It's not the absence of fear. It's the walking forward amidst and even despite fears.
Birth never goes how you think it will. Everyone has their story. That was just ours. But looking back, there was so much grace, so much beauty and so much love that surrounded us. God was with us and He cared for us.
It will always be a major milestone for Steve and me. One that we will never forget. And in the end, we beheld Isaac...our Isaac, born into the world at a crazy time, in an unexpected way. God wove it all together and it was beautiful.
His beauty always is.
Six years ago today God helped us be brave. And the next day we received one of our greatest gifts...our first son. Our laughter. Our joy. Our light. Our gift.