Homeschooling Update

So we've been quite busy around these parts!  But I am happy to report that all has gone back to normal on the playground.  The little girl has gone back out to play with my boys and there have not been any more issues.  We are a thankful bunch over here!

I'm going to post more about this on another post but, in addition to learning to homeschool, like I mentioned in my last post, I am trying to learn as much as I can about Rodan + Fields skincare.  I have two goals with this business-my first one is outrageous but possible.  I want to be able to earn enough to pay our rent in Albuquerque while we are in Colorado so that we can keep our house on the air force base. 

There are many reasons for this.  One is that it will simplify our moving so much.  It is such hard work to move!  Right after we got here, we started thinking about how we could keep this house.  We have to be able to store our stuff somewhere.  And since we'll be coming back to New Mexico within nine months, it'd be so nice to just take a few things to CO and then come back to an already unpacked house.  But there are also practical reasons for it too.  The reason we've been able to get on base in the first place is because occupancy dropped below 95%.  But if occupancy is back up, we will not have this option anymore.  We'd have to buy Steve a car, and live further away.  So that is another big reason to keep this house.  But we're not sure we can afford it. 

Anyhow, my next big, HUGE goal is to earn enough to pay rent and also to put the kids back in school next year.  Tuition is expensive and even though we'll be applying for scholarships, we'll still have to pay-we have four kids eligible for school next year.  And we don't expect a free ride.  We'll be living in smaller quarters in Colorado and it will be more difficult to have the kids around each other all day in such a small living area.  Plus it snows all winter so they'll be stuck inside a lot!  But it is doable.  And if we have to, we'll do it and be thankful.  So those are my goals.  Keeping our house here and putting the kids in Christian school are extras but it'd still be really nice! 

I am working on building up my business as much as I can before we go to Colorado!  If any of you are interested in Rodan + Fields products or the business opportunity, let me know!  Leave a comment or find me on facebook.  I'd love to talk to you about it!  The products are amazing.  My skin looks-wow!  I've not ever seen it look so radiant.  I'll probably be doing some giveaways on my blog too.  Don't worry, this blog won't turn into a Rodan + Fields blog, but I'm just putting it out there to anyone who is interested and who'd like to help support us while we are in grad school full-time!  It's a fun way to do it!

Now on to homeschooling.  We have just finished three weeks of homeschooling.  Yes, we've survived.  The first day was tough.  I'm not going to lie, I cried.  I cried for what my kids gave up for us to come here.  I cried for what I couldn't provide for them (like all the extra crafts, fun projects, etc...) in the day to day interactions we have at home.  (Yes, I can do those things but, since we are in upheaval right now having just moved, I have to keep things simple).  But after a pretty frank talk with Steve that night, I turned my attitude around a bit and tried to focus on the positive things that they are gaining by being at home with me.  And believe me, there are many!  This homeschooling adventure is temporary for our family.  We would like our kids to be in school.  But for now, this is what God has provided.  We are at a nomadic point in our lives and our kids need the stability of their studies coming from their parents.  And there aren't the right Christian schooling options out there anyway for us at this point.  So this is where we are. 

There are many good things though that I have seen in the last three weeks.  Here are just a few.  First, my kids are becoming quite tight.  When you're around each other all day, there is fighting.  However, there is also a lot of playing together and they are actually doing really well with it.  It's always been hard for me to integrate Josh with the older two boys.  That problem is becoming much less as time goes on.  Sometimes they need a break, but really, they have grown much closer in the past month since we moved and I am thankful. 

Secondly, I am becoming closer to them.  I see them all the time.  I get to tell them how much I like them and enjoy them throughout the day.  I feel like my relationship with my kids has grown and that's simply because I have more time to look them in the eyes each day.  I know it's not going to be like that forever.  And really, I want them to go out into the world and be independent.  But I am going to enjoy this time I get with them.  I really love being with them!

Lastly, I've been able to adjust their studies to their abilities.  They came from a great school that has prepped them so well in all their subjects.  However, our family is a math/science saturated family.  It is in their blood and they are surrounded by it all the time.  For example-the other night, at the dinner table, there was a huge debate as to who was the better scientist-Isaac Newton or Albert Einstein?  I said Newton by the way.  Yet, that's just our family culture.  A few of my kids needed to be pushed much more in those areas.  One in particular has taken off and I knew he would.  He's nipping at his big brother's heels in math.  So it's been fun for me to challenge them and introduce them to math that is hard for them! 

The actual schooling part isn't hard for me.  The grammar, math, handwriting, cursive, phonics, Bible, etc...it's the juggling the four older kids with Nathan running around.  I'm still trying to figure that part out.  Having a positive outlook on this whole area of our transition has really helped.  I definitely need a rest from them on weekends because I am around them 24-7 now and hardly get quiet.  But I am learning to get better in that area too.  I'm adjusting.  God is being faithful to me.  And I'm enjoying the ride.

Fridays are fun days and also prize days.  One thing that has helped is that I've run things much like their old school so they are used to what is going on.  Prize day was a huge motivator for my third son especially at St. Abe's.  It's proved to keep him in line at home too.  This past Friday we found the Arts and Crafts Center on base and they kids got to paint pottery and then have it fired for them.  They loved that!  We've been to the zoo and to our local children's math/science discovery museum called Explora.  Instead of Christmas gifts this year, since we were moving, we asked for passes to these places.  So fun!  And we have the flexibility to go do these things on our own time. 

We're going to make it.  It's not been a perfect transition but I see God's hand and I'm thankful.  Always thankful.   

    

Erroring on the Side of Grace

So we are getting used to a new life here.  There are many wonderful things, some okay things and some difficult things.  Such is the stuff of uprooting and committing to a nomadic life of grad school with five children in tow!  I am also learning how to homeschool which is a huge job in itself, especially because I want to do a good job!  I am also starting my own business with Rodan + Fields skincare.  Basically, the doctors who created ProActive also started another skincare line that has been taking off.  It's been all over Hollywood, The Today Show, Oprah, etc...A lot of people are really getting into it because the products actually work.  I'm just excited to get in with this company and start helping people get better skin!  I've talked with numerous moms whose children have extreme eczema to other women who just want to take care of their neverending acne.  Anyhow, trying to get that off the ground has definitely taken up some time too.  Not to mention my children, they pretty much take 98 percent of my time.  But we are adjusting and learning to thrive here in the high desert!

One thing that has really stood out to me is that we are in a different place.  You might say, "Duh!".  No but seriously, on the outside things don't look all that different.  But the longer we're here in our neighborhood, the more I understand that we are in a different place all together.  We are not living among friends anymore like we were at Monte Vista.  We are living among strangers who do not necessarily care about us or our kids.

Here is my most recent example:  There is a playground in our backyard.  Our house happens to be the closest house to it.  That's been nice.  I've been able to send the kids out to play and lots of neighbor kids go out there as well.  For the most part, our kids have gotten along swimmingly with all the other kids.  There have been a few things we've had to talk through (like today Josh asked me if God was really real because a girl on the playground had told him that He wasn't).  There have been things like that that come with other kids being raised differently than mine.

Today I was reminded though about how many opportunities I will have to show grace.  One of the biggest lessons I learned from our old church community was the absolute importance of seeking reconciliation, getting clear and asking forgiveness.  It goes a long way.  And God commands it.  Direct application to my life right now.  When we first moved here there was a little girl who I immediately knew was trouble.  Some of the stuff my boys were reporting to us after playing tipped me off that she was one I needed to watch.  They weren't always angels to her either but, like we try to practice in our family, when they did something unkind, no matter how small, they had to seek reconciliation with her even though many times, she was the instigator.  It didn't matter to me, they had to do what's right no matter what.

On one occasion this past week I went out to tell my boys they had five minutes to play.  Without knowing it, I walked into a bit of an argument between my oldest (who is seriously the sweetest so the fact that he was upset was alarming) and this girl.  He was insisting she stop calling them names and she was denying it like she had never done anything of the sort and had NO clue what he was talking about.  Super suspicious.  However, like any mom would do, I tried to help them sort it out.  And I made sure Isaac asked forgiveness for his tone and she accepted.  She of course didn't care to make things right herself.  I mentioned for everyone to show each other respect and then let them play.

After that, things got weird.  This girl started telling all the kids she couldn't play with mine because they were mean, and my boys started getting really hurt.  Everytime they would come out to play, she would run away and mention loudly how she wasn't allowed around them, etc...This was a new experience for me.  My kids normally get along with everyone.  Finally, Steve and I felt it was time to intervene.  So Steve went over to talk with the parents.  And it came out that they were highly offended that I had talked to their daughter about anything.  I should've received permission from them before speaking to her about being nice.  Really I was just generally speaking to all the kids and really tried to lean on my kids, being much harder on them and really light with her, mostly trying to just clear the air.  But it was too much for them.  I had acted inappropriately and that's why they had pulled their daughter from play with our kids.

When Steve came home and told me the root of the problem I wanted to be furious.  I did.  How incredibly insane.  Who thinks like that?  But he quickly reminded me that we don't know their story.  We had offended them and we had to do what we could to make it right.  After a few minutes of gathering my wits, we walked hand in hand over to their house and I apologized.  Not because they deserved it but because God's grace had to cover this one.  God's grace had to.  It was too insane.  Too crazy for me to understand.  But I had to get clear.  I had to seek forgiveness.  It's what God tells us to do.  Be at peace.

It was so difficult to make that walk over there.  I wanted to fight and tell God how unjust it was!  But deep down I knew.  I knew that I can never go wrong when I seek to get clear.  That's a valuable lesson I've learned over time.  Forgiveness diffuses things.  I haven't always done it right in the past.  But I know now, repentance is what God calls us to no matter how difficult and even when others are ridiculous.

I could tell that they were disarmed immediately.  I mean, how do you argue with that?  How do you keep hating when someone just comes over and says, "Wow, I am so sorry I offended you.  That wasn't my intention.  If you'd like me to come talk to you instead of speaking to your daughter about anything, then I will respect that.  Please forgive me!"  You can't argue with it.  God's grace is so powerful!  I have no idea if they will come around and let their daughter play with our kids.  Or if they'll be cordial with us or even like us at all.  But I do know, we've done our part.  And hopefully, they will see the One who is behind it all-Christ.  Because repentance is so counter-cultural.  God will use it.

I may be out of our my safe little Monte Vista bubble now here.  But I'm going to learn a lot and hopefully, those around me will experience God's grace.  I know I need it.  And so do they.

But most of all, I'm thankful for the neighborhood we had surrounding us for so long and for our church that lived in community with others in such a way that reflected this transparency.  These lessons will follow me the rest of my days.  I won't always like their application, but I will think with fondness on those who really taught me about this and I will thank God for the opportunities to grow and learn.

Erroring on the side of grace is always the way to go...no matter what.  No matter what.    

The rest of the story...

I can't tell you how many times we've been asked since arriving here, "Why on earth would you move from California to New Mexico?"  Well, my friends, this is the reason why.  Here is our Christmas Card letter from this year detailing the ins and outs of why we picked up and moved to an unknown place at Christmastime.  The rest of the story...

Merry Christmas!  Instead of giving individual details about each of us, we're going to give a general update due to the fact that our general update is quite a big one!  No, we are not expecting another baby!  The main news round these parts is that we are moving and Steve is changing careers.  After eight and a half years of Steve teaching Calculus and Physics at Monte Vista Christian School, we are packing up mid-year (right at Christmastime to be exact) to go on a new adventure.  So as you can imagine, we have boxes everywhere, our kitchen cupboards are bare and all the toys aren't under the tree but rather packed in boxes.  

Nevertheless, amidst the chaos we are living in right now, we have our Christmas tree up and bright, and the Advent Calendar on the wall.  Both are timeless reminders to us to focus on Christ as much as we can during this season, trusting Him to provide for all our needs.

So why are we moving and where are we moving to?  Here is the story.  As you all know, Steve has been pursuing his MS in Computational Mathematics via Texas A & M's distance program.  It took 3 1/2 years of him working full-time and going to school on the side.  It was a long trek for us but good in so many ways!  We both worked very hard; Steve at his studies and me in my support of him.  God blessed our efforts and granted Steve success in his work.  He graduated in May, Magna Cum Laude.

During the last year and a half of his Masters, Steve began to feel pretty heavily pulled to switch out of teaching and into the industry.  We began preparing him to do so which consisted of him taking an extra engineering exam, lots of networking and researching various industry jobs.  Last December he even interviewed with the Navy and we thought that might be our answer!  One Friday he got the email, and the next week they were flying him out to Virginia.  But then the Sequester hit and he ended up not being hired.  Now we are thankful that God intervened.  But at the time, we were devastated.  Trying to switch careers with five little people to feed is not easy.  Everything had to make sense and work.

So we prayed.  We prayed that God would lead us and guide us.  And then we started sending out applications.  Meanwhile, Steve began his last class for his MS and commenced working on his Final Oral Examination (Oral Thesis Project) to be defended in May.  He chose to research James Maxwell's Equations of Electromagnetism because he had always been fascinated by the material.  Throughout the semester we were waiting for some sort of break.  He had excellent skills, a great new degree coming and awesome transcripts.  However, he had no practical experience.  Many of his applications were rejected.  We were networking and narrowing down what we were looking for but just needed someone to take a chance on him. 

In April we got in contact with a friend of my Dad's who is a Physicist.  Steve had a brief conversation with him and he told Steve to email his colleague who headed up a research group right in our backyard in Monterey.  When we looked up the group, we were shocked to see that their whole area of research is in electromagnetic waves which was directly related to Steve's research for his Final Oral Exam.  We quickly emailed this contact and he responded that he might have room for Steve to intern if they ended up with some funding.  But due to the Sequester, he did not think it would happen.  He promised to be in touch.

Steve graduated in May.  We threw him a huge party and he started teaching summer school.  We got in touch with the group in Monterey again but there was no change.  That's when we began thinking.  Steve needed experience for his resume.  He was already teaching summer school and then would have six weeks off.  He could go work for free.  We didn't need the money, Steve just needed experience.  So we put it out there to them and they accepted!  In fact, they had the perfect short project for him to work on that had been in need of a mathematician.

After summer school ended, Steve started going down to Monterey to work on the problem.  Every day he came back pumped.  Little by little he was learning the ins and outs of this problem and by the end of his time there, he had solved it for them.  It had not previously been solved.  But that's not the end! While he was working there, they landed a huge contract and ended up paying Steve for the whole internship!  Working with this group had also confirmed his desire to do research.  But research meant a PhD and we had just finished 3.5 arduous years of him doing his Masters.  Steve wasn't burnt on the material just on working full-time and doing school (all of us were).  At the end of his internship though, his boss encouraged him to finish his degree and told him he would help him.

And he did not disappoint!  Right as Steve was starting the new school year at Monte Vista, his summer boss started advocating for him with his colleagues.  He got in touch with a Math Professor at Colorado State University telling her about Steve and his work over the summer, and how she should be interested in him as a student.  She immediately started working on getting Steve admitted to the PhD program for Spring 2014 (it was past the deadline already).  Then she sent off his resume/transcripts to Sandia National Labs in Albuquerque.  Her contact there said they were just starting to look for some Year Round PhD interns and thought Steve would be a perfect fit.  They wanted him to start in January. 

Meanwhile, the runaway train had taken on a life of its own.  It was not a path that we had foreseen nor thought possible.  In fact, we had talked about a PhD numerous times since the Masters had gone so well, but simply thought it impossible to support our family financially during it!  But God paved the way for every single step, mounting every obstacle and leveling the road.  Steve and I stood back and watched this marvelous story unfold before our eyes and we were in awe.  Everyone was fighting for him, connecting him, helping him and advocating for him.  In early October, we found out Steve was formally admitted to Colorado State for the Spring.  A few weeks later, his advisor (the Math Professor) came out to Stanford for a conference and he met her there for the first time.  The rest is history. 

Steve's PhD will take 3.5 years.  The first eight months we will live in Albuquerque on Kirtland Air Force Base.  Steve will work for Sandia Labs and get a grip on the area he will be researching for his dissertation.  Then we will move to Colorado and we will spend a year living in residence with Steve taking classes at Colorado State.  Since his Masters program was so comprehensive, he only needs one year of coursework, as many courses count toward his PhD and Qualifying Exams.  We are thankful!  After that, we will move back to Albuquerque for Steve to continue working for Sandia National Labs and also to finish his dissertation.  Our stay in Albuquerque the second time will be at least two years.

There you have it, in case you missed it!  That's what we're doing and how we got here.  More about our move on base to come.  Base living is quite an adventure!  But we are thankful for our home and know God has put us here for this time.

Much love to you all!  

We Are Here!

It's been over two months since I've posted.  So sorry!  And I have tons of pictures on my camera of our adventures that won't upload to the computer for some reason so I don't have any pictures for this post!  So sorry again!  Anyhow, for the last two months I've spent every waking extra moment packing our home and prepping for our out-of-state move.  There were many unknowns all the way up until the last minute.  Seriously.  We thought we knew what was going to happen but truly, until two weeks prior, we weren't even for sure what state we were moving to.

I know this can be confusing because I never finished the story.  I got distracted with packing boxes.  I think at this point it'd be difficult to drag you all through it.  But for clarity's sake, I will post the story from our Christmas card this year for my next post.  That will get some of you up to speed.  If you care to know how we got to this point, tune in next time for an abbreviated version.

But we are here now and boy has it been quite a trip!  Imagine piling 5 little kids into a Honda Pilot ages 1-8 years old and driving all the way to New Mexico-with NO DVD player thank you very much.  They did just fine.  We looked for license plates, counted trains (36 total seen) and the kids colored and read.  Nathan had a tough time sometimes but he's a baby.  He's allowed.

We started out by just going to LA for New Year's.  That was a lot of fun.  We got to stay with our some of our best college buddies and their family.  They spoiled us with good food, great conversation and an easy in and out set-up.  We hardly had to unpack our car they had everything set-up perfectly for us there.  Leaving from there helped.  They prayed for us and reminded us they believed in us.  It was a great way to leave CA.

After realizing two days prior on our way to LA that Nathan does NOT like the car for very long at all, we decided that our all day trip to from LA to New Mexico had to be strategic.  So we planned to hit the road early.  We were on the freeway after filling up at 5:30 am.  That made a huge difference.  We were able to get to Flagstaff, AZ by lunchtime only stopping once for gas in the Mojave Desert.  Then all three littler ones fell asleep.  The older two in the back played games.  It was a quiet afternoon when we crossed the border into New Mexico.  After that, we raced the sun to Albuquerque.  We made it to the city by dinnertime.  Not bad.  Not bad at all.

One of the themes of this last week is God's faithfulness in our weakness and our need to follow His lead.  Our plan was to arrive Thursday night, stay in a hotel and then move onto Kirtland Air Force Base the next day.  However, when we were only 200 miles out of Albuquerque, I happened to check my email and the housing office had emailed that morning that they had to delay our move-in due to the carpets needing to be replaced.  They had known we were moving in for a month and they didn't figure this out yet?!  We weren't pleased at all.  Now instead of moving in we were going to be stuck in a hotel for four nights!  Who was going to pay for that?  We tried to regroup and then just had to let go.  God had this.  There were reasons for this delay.  We just couldn't see them yet.

Our leasing agent knew that they had totally inconvenienced us so she offered to put us up until our house was ready.  So the hotel was paid for.  All we had to do was wait it out...all seven of us, in a hotel room.  Ha!  But truly, we picked a good place that had two rooms, a kitchen and a free breakfast.  It was small for sure, but it would be doable for a few days.  I tried to be cheerful as I set-up camp.

My cheerfulness started to wane a bit as I heard my poor husband up in the night sick.  As the night went on, he was more and more sick.  He had a horrible headache, was sick to his stomach and just felt terrible.  We think he was altitude sick (we had just moved from sea level to 5500 feet) because none of the rest of us got the same sickness.  On the one hand, I was thankful we weren't moving the next day!  On the other hand, I knew it was me, myself and I, with the kids, in a very strange city that I had only just seen that night (we had never visited Albuquerque prior to moving)!  I had to get the kids out the next morning to do something so Steve could rest and get better.  I wanted to panic!!  Where would we go in this huge city?  However, God calmed my heart.  I made plans in the middle of the night to get groceries and some needed supplies.  No time to be intimidated.  It was go-time.

Armed with Siri and God's mercy, the kids and I went out exploring the next morning.  We found my happy place-Trader Joe's and suddenly, things felt a bit more familiar.  I began mapping out some plans in my mind about where kids would nap for the next few days, how/where we'd get our meals taken care of and basically tried to re-plan our entire upcoming weekend now that Daddy was sick and we weren't moving in.  God's strength welled up in me and I felt hope that He was there.  I knew it.  I knew that He knew and I saw right away that our move-in delay was all a part of His plan.  As I saw that, I began to relax.

Steve was sick all of Friday and a lot of Saturday.  Saturday morning he came out to the Aquarium with us for two hours or so.  We had just gotten passes from grandparents for Christmas.  After that he went back to bed.  But he was slowly getting better.  In the meantime, the kids played lots of cards, colored, we went out for errands and made some meals at the hotel.  The kids weren't sleeping well at night but, all in all, things were going as smoothly as they could under the circumstances.  God was taking care of us at every turn.

By Saturday night Steve felt better.  He had been researching some local churches in the area and we narrowed it down to two.  We picked one over the other because they encouraged families to bring their kids into service with them.  Any church that values children sitting with their parents really stands out to us so we decided to go there.  We were so glad we did!

This church immediately welcomed us.  Of course we were noticed right away.  Wherever we go with our five kids we're noticed.  This time being a spectacle came in handy!  Everyone asked us what we needed and within a short time, we had identified a few people that worked at Sandia (where Steve will be interning) and a family that lived on Kirtland Air Force base (where we are living).  One of them offered to help us with whatever we needed when we arrived on base the next day!  We were so thankful!  The delay in our move-in had allowed us to meet some people and connect with a church.  That ended up being key to our move on base.

But I'll get to that next time.  That's a story in itself.  What we had seen at this point is that despite our own plans, God would determine our steps and care for us in the best way.  We just had to trust Him.  We made it to New Mexico and we were in His hands.  He'd provide for everything else.

James Maxwell

Meanwhile, Steve was still in grad school finishing his last class-computational linear algebra.  And in fact, he was working on his thesis project which was a graduation requirement.  He didn't know it at the time but, his project proved to be very strategic in this whole journey.  He chose the topic because he loved the material.  Michael Faraday and James Maxwell had always been scientific heroes of his and so he decided to study about Maxwell's Equations of Electromagnetism which are the bedrock foundation of electromagnetism and electrical engineering.

As an aside, this project was truly a beauty from ashes thing for him.  When Steve started at Cal Poly, he was talented and expected to do well; he entered as an electrical engineering student.  He spent nearly three years in the major but he was young and lacked discipline.  All of the sudden he had to study.  And he didn't have the skills or the confidence to fight through the difficulties.  The more difficulties he faced the more he retreated.  As a result, he didn't do well.  

He switched out of electrical engineering and when we got married, finished in math.  But his difficulties as an undergrad always haunted him.  He felt deep regret for how he had handled his studies and also felt that his potential had been wasted.  That is why, after five years, he went back to school for his Masters in Math and he rocked it, showing his abilities.  With maturity and much more on the line, he really soared.  

So it was fitting that his final project for his Masters in Math was an electrical engineering project (that was very math heavy).  When he told his graduate committee chair what he wanted to do, his chair was a bit reticent saying he thought the content might be too difficult.  But Steve was determined.  So his chair relented and told him to make sure and update him regularly on his progress so that he could be sure he was headed in the right direction.  So Steve researched and slowly worked his way through Maxwell's Equations, teaching himself the ins and outs of the problems.  He also read Maxwell's biography and that really touched him bringing out the humanity in Maxwell and not just the genius in the math. 

In fact, awhile back, I posted about a poem Steve read to me one particular Saturday toward the end of Texas A & M.  That Saturday he had been out all day working on Maxwell and had come across the poem in Maxwell's biography.  The poem has had a huge presence in our lives since.  We recite it to each other often.  It's posted on our bedroom wall.  

"Trust me Spring is very near, All the buds are swelling, All the glory of the year, In those buds is dwelling.  What the open buds reveal, Tell us life is flowing, What the buds still shut, conceal, we shall end in knowing....".  

It became a continual reminder of what we were working toward.  And that God would reveal to us where we were headed in His time.  Spring was coming.

Steve presented his thesis project to his committee, passed his final oral exit exam, finished his last class and graduated with honors in May.  We thought we'd know where we were going by then.  But we didn't.  It was a bit disappointing but we tried really hard to just keep going forward, keep working as hard as we could to open up connections for him, and let God do the rest.  And did God have a HUGE blessing in the works.  

We had no idea what was coming right around the corner...but God was about ready to move on our behalf in a big way.

It looked like nothing was in sight and then God just moved.

"For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground."  Isaiah 44:3

Three Paths and Valentine's Day 2013

One of the biggest hurdles in this whole process was Steve getting a vision of what he was looking for in a career.  We knew he liked math.  We knew he could solve big problems.  We just didn't know how that translated to the industry.  So we started researching again.  I looked at all sorts of options and narrowed down three paths he could take-engineering, computer science and finance.  Now these areas were pretty broad but at least we could start to think about each one and then pick a direction.  

We knew that Steve had the ability to program.  His masters is in Computational Mathematics.  However, programming is not his favorite and he doesn't care to do it all the time.  He will program enough to solve big systems of equations as they relate to math problems, but not just to program itself.  It's not interesting to him.  So computer science was out.

Finance held a lot of promise.  Many mathematicians run statistics for insurance companies (they are called actuaries) and others work on the stock market.  Yet when we thought about this option, we knew it wasn't Steve.  He's not a flashy businessman-type.  He's more quiet and simple.  

What it came down to was this-Steve wanted to creatively solve big math problems.  The best bet for this type of work would lie in the engineering world working on real-world applications.  And since he had passed the EIT, he was considered an engineer in training so that lent him some credibility in the engineering industry.  But doing what in engineering?  There are millions of types of engineers.  That's when we started networking.

During this process, God led us to many people to talk to.  Steve has many relatives that are pretty academic and "mathy" so we started with them.  He talked with cousins, his uncle who is a math guy and various others about what he likes to do with math and how his skills would translate to the industry.  These conversations sparked a lot of thought and helped us narrow down even more what we were looking for.  Isaac's teacher at school got us in touch with her Dad who has been an engineer at Boeing for years.  Her Dad talked at length with Steve about his skills, gave him advice and was a great first encounter with the industry.  These conversations were not easy for Steve.  He had to really gear himself up to talk to all of these people, many of whom he did not know, and put himself out there.  It was really, really hard for him.  But he did it.  The Navy had given him a taste.  He wanted to know more.  

Meanwhile, I was always researching for him.  I discovered that Raytheon was a pretty big engineering firm and that they did presentations at various colleges throughout the year.  They happened to be coming to Stanford in February...on Valentine's Day to be exact.  So we made plans to go up there and see their presentation for Valentine's Day!  We didn't have much information about the presentation since Steve isn't a student there so we weren't even sure where the presentation was!  We literally looked all over campus for an hour.  It was like trying to find a needle in a haystack.  We had the GPS on our iPhone and the address and that was it.  I kept praying the whole time, as we circled, that we'd find it.  We had driven an hour and a half to find out more about Raytheon, but every minute that passed brought more and more frustration to Steve.  

I knew any minute he was going to give up.  I kept my mouth shut, only opening it to say positive things, and let him fight it out inside.  I knew everything inside of him just wanted to bail and go home.  I knew it.  But that was old Steve.  That was Steve at Cal Poly when things got difficult.  That wasn't Steve now, on the brink of graduating with honors with his Masters.  Steve now was responsible, mature and accomplished. He had to keep going.  I let him battle with himself and just held his hand in silence.   

Going to this presentation was a huge step for him and I knew it.  We had to find it!  Just when I could tell he nearly reached the end of himself, we found it.  Phew!  We had to bring Nathan with us so I sat out in the foyer and played with him while Steve watched the presentation praying the whole time that God would meet him there and give him some direction.  I had no idea what to expect when he walked out.  Would he be happy?  Feel like it was a waste of our effort?  Be intrigued?

I was pleasantly surprised.  He was totally blown away and encouraged.  He left saying, "Why have I never known there are jobs out there like that?  They are looking for people like me.  I can do that.  And I am so interested in that work.  How can I get there?  What do I have to do to get there?" He was pumped.  He had a vision now.  He wanted to work for a company like that doing creative math and engineering.  He talked to a recruiter afterward, getting over more fears, and got even more information on how his skills would fit in at Raytheon.  She also affirmed my belief that he should try and get an internship to get some hands-on experience for his resume.  All in all, it was very encouraging.    

Afterward, we were starving so we headed to In N Out at 9 pm to finally have dinner.  Both of us were beaming.  Nathan sat on the table in between us, we held hands, and declared it would be a Valentine's Day to remember.  We had received some direction.  We still weren't sure our future but Steve had a little piece of the vision now.  He had seen what was potentially out there for him and he was pumped.  Valentine's Day 2013 will always be a special, momentous day for us.  

In the midst of winter and uncertainty, it was a bright day of hope and optimism.  God would direct us.  We just had to keep putting one foot in front of the other and trust Him as He wrote our story.

Next Steps-The EIT and The Navy

Since we didn't know where to go next, we prayed.  We also researched various opportunities and discovered the Department of Defense hires many mathematicians.  All this research was a lengthy and daunting process.  Much of the feedback we received was good.  However, Steve hadn't narrowed down exactly what he wanted to do with his math abilities.  And without a clear vision, it's hard to move forward.

Last fall we made a couple of moves in a different direction to test the waters.  One of those moves was him taking an engineering exam called the Engineer in Training Exam (EIT).  We decided he'd take the exam about six weeks prior to the exam date in October.  Nathan, our fifth, had just been born in August.  Steve was in his second to last grad school class and was also teaching a new class for his day job along with his three other preps (subjects).  As a result, the fact that it was a last minute decision and that Steve was so overextended in all sorts of other areas meant he didn't have much time to study for the exam except for the week prior to taking it. But we knew it was a step in the right direction.  If he could pass this exam, on a whim, it would give him some confidence that his skills were valuable and transferable.  It would also lend him some credibility.  He had to try.  So we took the leap.  He passed.

During this time, we also started applying for jobs.  By "we" I mean, I applied for them, for Steve.  It takes so much effort to apply for jobs!  And since he was so tied up in working, finishing up well at A & M, etc...it made sense for me to research and apply for him.  Most of the jobs were mathematician jobs for the government because the government will employ math guys at the master's level.  Many other companies require a PhD.  So we started sending out a ton of applications.  Many of them came back with "Eligible but not passed on to the hiring manager."  It's tough to get rejection.  And we pretty much knew why.  He had excellent grades but no practical experience.  He needed some.  We just weren't sure how to get him there. However, we knew that in time, if we kept pressing forward, something would work out.

We had our first big break in December when one of the applications came back with an offer for an interview with the Navy.  I'll never forget Steve's smile when he came home that day.  He had forwarded me the email so I knew about it but I had no idea what he thought about it.  He was beaming.  The Navy wanted him out there as soon as possible.  So less than a week later, Steve was on a plane out to Virginia, with all of his expenses covered.  It was a whirlwind experience for him.  And we were ecstatic that this opportunity had presented itself to us.  Virginia is beautiful, affordable, and working for the Navy was not only financially expedient but a worthy cause.

Steve heading out to Virginia for his interview with the Navy

However, right after interviewing, Steve knew that both jobs (he had been up for two different positions) didn't quite fit.  He was looking to creatively solve big math problems.  One of the mathematician jobs had much more to do with finance.  The other one was helping to build guns on navy ships, which seemed interesting but the work environment that he witnessed was not attractive to him.  At least that was his impression and he was reticent about that side of things.

Everything else was amazing.  We would've done it.  We would've done it anyway despite the jobs not being a good fit because it was an amazing deal.  And at the time we didn't know if another opportunity would present itself.  Plus, although Steve is a very talented mathematician, he lacked practical experience in the work force so we felt that we had to take what we could get.  But God had His way.  Steve interviewed just prior to The Sequester.  I am unsure if you are familiar with that but there were some pretty big spending cuts that took place to the Department of Defense in January and these cuts were called The Sequester.  Steve interviewed right before Christmas.  So although the Navy liked him, they got put under a hiring freeze and could not hire him.

Needless to say, we were devastated.  Not only had Virginia been taken off the table, but it seemed that the entire job market that we had targeted, the Department of Defense, had been obliterated.  Where were we to go next?  It was a hard pill to swallow.  But after a bit, we gathered our wits about us, and hit the ground running again, this time focusing on more of the private sector.  We also really tried narrowing down the direction we were going.  Was it engineering, physics, math....?  We also started thinking about internships.

It's all about the networking.  Networking, networking, networking.  My husband hates talking on the phone and dislikes even more putting himself out there.  However, after having flown across the country on his first big job interview with the US Navy, he had a taste of what might be out there.  And that pushed him out of his box.

Networking and talking on the phone with all sorts of different people in the industry...what was God going to do with all of that?  Only time would tell.