Lil' Joshua is Two

Of course I've wanted to get on the computer and write but I've been so crazy busy these past few days. Joshua turned two on Monday and in true Dauphin fashion, we had to have a our share of celebrations. Life just isn't full without celebrations and feasting huh!! There's always an excuse to party. Anyhow, we started over the weekend by celebrating with the Dauphins at Henry Cowell State Park. Grandma's birthday is just a few days before Joshua's so we did a little combo party. Grandpa grilled some meat and we all feasted. The kids also had a great time playing in the woods. Usually we head down to the river for water fun but opted out this time. Steve had a tetanus shot the afternoon before and he got a reaction to it-he felt like he had the flu for about twenty-four hours. So since he wasn't up to par, we decided to skip it this time. He told me that he now has much more sympathy for our kids when they get shots. Poor guy. We still had fun though.

Monday Joshua woke up to the usual decorated house full of streamers and balloons. Cinnamon rolls were also waiting on the table. This is always our birthday breakfast. They devoured the cinnamon rolls just in time for us all to get dressed and out the door to drive carpool. That night we took the kids into town to the mall. We got everyone Hot Dog on a Stick corndogs and fries, and the kids got to play for a few hours in the play area. My parents, Yia Ya and Pa Pou, met us there since they couldn't come to Joshua's little neighborhood party the next day. After riding a few of the mall rides (which is a huge treat because we NEVER bring money for those rides) my parents treated everyone to Dairy Queen blizzards. Seriously...what more could you ask for on your birthday? Grandparents, playing, hot dog and fries, and ice cream. Pure and utter childhood bliss. And easy for Mom and Dad to pull-off too if I do say so myself. All day it was really fun to see his eyes so full of awe and wonder over everything around him. You could really tell that he knew it was his special day. I love it when my kids start to understand that we're celebrating them and their addition to our family. It really is a wonderful realization.





Last night we rounded out the celebrations by having a joint neighborhood party with one of our little buddies Beniam. He and Joshua are born a day apart and so our families teamed up to throw them a party. I had promised Joshy a football cake and so that is what he got. After I showed him his cake in the fridge, he kept running back and wanting to look at it. You could tell he was happy he'd finally gotten his own cake.






That precious, little exuberant boy is two and he isn't afraid of anything. Watch out world. Here he comes!

Sneaky

This little guy is the goofball of the house. He has SO much personality wound up inside of him that is spills out involuntarily and constantly. Sometimes his exuberance is to his advantage and sometimes it is not. Anyhow, I knew something was wrong with him today when he wouldn't eat his lunch and then proceeded to lay on the couch crying next to me while I nursed the baby. I finally put him down for an early nap thinking his cold was just bothering him.

When he woke up, he breathing was very rapid and labored and he wouldn't stop crying. My mom happened to be visiting and she has a TON of experience with wheezing as all of her children, myself included, had varying degrees of asthma. She thought he was wheezing. So did I. That's when I decided to call my running buddy who is an NP and whose children also have asthma. I knew she could tell me for sure.

She lives very close by and so I ran him over to her house. She didn't even really need her stethoscope as she could tell he was wheezing just by listening to him. How did I not know this sooner? She told me to call his doc. Fifteen minutes and a phone call later he was in the car on the way to Urgent Care with his Dad (who was my hero and came home in the middle of grading tests to take him to the doctor). Luckily they got him in right away, he got a breathing treatment, his oxygen levels went back to normal and his little personality started to rebound.

Meanwhile, I'm back at the ranch feeling like a total loser. Asthma is really a tough phantom to deal with. His pediatrician has described it to me in the past like a smoldering fire. You think it is out yet a little bit of oxygen can get it roaring again in no time. Joshua hadn't had any sort of episode in a year and a half and he'll be two on Monday. A whole year and a half! That's three quarters of his short little life. He's had numerous colds since then but none of them have caused the scary turn of events that happened today. I didn't even have any medicine on hand anymore because I didn't think I'd need it. I was totally unprepared.

When he was in his first year of life he had a few episodes of wheezing that caused our doctor to guess he might have asthma. For awhile I thought he might too and I was diligent to watch him carefully whenever he got a cold. But then, it seemed to totally disappear for a long time. I got comfortable. I stopped looking for signs and let things slide here and there. And then this attack came out of nowhere and I was left feeling like I just won the Stupid Mother of the Year Award. I knew he was susceptible. I should've seen it coming. How did I miss the signs?

Days like this remind me that being a mom is so dependent on God's sheer grace. People always think since I have four children, that I have so much experience/practice at being a mom. Well, hear me now people, while I do get a lot of practice, it definitely doesn't always make perfect. I make mistakes constantly whether its in judgment and fairness, lacking patience with a child, or a health related issue like Joshua's asthma. I just simply can't get it all right no matter how hard I try to. None of us can really.

Yet, I have this umbrella of protection that covers me. It's called God's grace and mercy. The two working in tandem make it so I can survive these years with a confidence that comes from knowing that there is Someone else looking out for my children besides myself. It doesn't mean that I'll make it through without anything bad happening. It just means that whatever does happen, happens because God has allowed it to, whether it's good or bad. I can find rest in knowing that He will care for me.

I totally saw that today. My mom happened to be around making it much easier for me to run Joshua over to my friend's house without having to pack everyone up to go. I may not have acted as quickly if she wasn't there. Plus my mom was the one who thought he needed to be tended to in the first place and encouraged me to get it checked out. Then my friend happened to be home. She works part-time but has Thursdays off. She also totally knows what to look for so it was so great she could check him out. Then Steve got him to Urgent Care before he totally went downhill. These are all ways God cared for me and covered me, even though I didn't quite see what was going on at first and I'm thankful.

So now that that's over and all we need to do is keep administering medicine for the next few weeks, I can breathe a bit easier myself. Yet, in the meantime I've declared war on this pesky little disease called asthma.

All right sneaky little asthma. I've got my eye on you now. You may have gotten me this time but from now on, I'm on the lookout. Lord willing, you won't sneak past me again.

Constant Dripping

Autumn is settling in nicely around these parts and Winter will be hard on its heels. Since we don't get major differences in seasons here, I have other ways of being able to tell that the seasons are changing. One of them, unfortunately, is none other than the common cold. We've had a few come through the house already. I do love the cooler months but I don't particularly care for colds.

One of the reasons is this...the constant dripping. It seems to go on forever! The pesky dripping is about enough to drive me nuts on some days. Lately I feel like at least one of my boys is dripping which makes me feel like it has been going on for weeks now. This morning God gave me a little word picture (who says motherhood doesn't involve your brain?) that easily applied right to my daily life of endlessly wiping noses and I was reminded again and convicted.

Proverbs 19:13 "A foolish son is his father's ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping."

Proverbs 27:15 "A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day..."

Drip...drip...drip...drip...wipe...drip...drip...drip...are you annoyed yet? It never stops. No matter how much you wipe it up, it always comes back and keeps dripping. The maintenance, monotony and mucous create a literal muddled mess.

How often can my restless and quarrelsome spirit create an emotional and spiritual mess for my hubby? Do I really want to be like a snotty, nasty, dripping, stuffy nose to my husband? I've never thought about it like that before but for some reason today, that was the word picture in my head. No real incidence prompted the analogy...just lots of nose wiping. I guess it was time for me to be reminded yet again not to merely look out for my own interests.

No...I don't want to be that mess. I want to be this:

Proverbs 16:24 "Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."

Lord, give me words. Let them be pleasant. Let them be sweet. Let them heal and soothe. Let them be like honey.

Some More Lawrence Lucas

The Things You'll See is still one of my favorite parenting books. I love it for its wisdom, its gentleness and its brevity. Each chapter gives little snippets of insight into lovingly bringing up children for the Lord and they equip without wearing down. So refreshing. I keep coming back to it time and time again. I wanted to share this one because its pertinent in my life with all my children...but especially Joshua right now as he turns two in a week and just needs so much direction. May we all be reminded to keep on keeping on. Not for us but for them. And ultimately--for His Glory!!

Avoiding Confrontation

Discipline your son while there is hope; do not set your heart on his destruction.
Proverbs 19:18

Rescue those who are being taken away to death; hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter. If you say, "Behold, we did not know this," does not he who weighs the heart perceive it? Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it, and will he not requite man according to his work?
Proverbs 24:11-12

Most of us would avoid confrontation given the choice. Yet training children necessarily calls for confrontation. Not the pugnacious, in-your-face variety that has come to dominate our understanding of the word, but the clear, loving presentation of a person's sin to that person, for their good and sometimes for the reconciliation of a relationship. There's no way to avoid it, nor should we seek to.

Folly is bound up in the heart of a child; the Scriptures are clear on this. It threatens our children's well-being. It will spell their death if not rooted out. Therefore we should welcome every opportunity to discover and unearth its faintest traces. We should diligently watch for it, so that we can remove it. Like a malignant cancer it must not be left untreated.

I know this sounds dramatic, but it's not overstated. If we dread confrontation with our children, if we try to buy their compliance or sweet talk them into obeying, we need to turn our thinking completely around. We need to quit dreading and start welcoming every opportunity we're given to see the beginnings of sin or folly, like an oncologist who wants to find every trace of cancer, to eradicate it. This is not welcoming evil; it's welcoming the discovery of evil so that it can be driven out.

When we think "anything to avoid a scene", we need to face what's included in the "anything". We may save ourselves some unpleasantness or embarrassment, but the cost will be borne by our children, and it will be staggering. Besides, you need feel no shame about addressing your children's folly in the company of the wise. They've all been there and they're inwardly approving, and often interceding for you.

If we feel the need to promise them a snack later so they won't pitch a fit about not getting one now, if we're training them to cheerfully obey only when we use the right tone of voice, or offer an adequate explanation, then we're merely doing our best to keep symptoms from appearing. Disciplining is neither pleasant for us nor for our children. That won't change. The pleasantness of its fruit, though, in both your lives and the lives of your children, will exceed your bravest expectations.

Odds and Ends

These last few weeks have been busy as I've been trying to get used to a new routine. Yet I've been surprisingly at ease with all of the changes to our normal schedule and I'm thinking that this school thing is working out just fine for our family for now. I'm thankful. We had gone back and forth on whether or not to home school for quite some time yet felt like putting Isaac into the classical christian school started by our church was the right fit for us at this time. I know not every family feels this way. Some people are strongly for public education and letting their children be little lights in their community. Others are strongly for homeschooling and keeping their children as near to them as possible. Some people make decisions based on what is best in their current circumstances. And gasp-some people end up changing their minds later and switching their children around.

That's what is so amazing about families. God made them all unique with their own culture. No two families are alike even if they share all of the same principles. We are responsible to give our children a christian education and whatever we choose to do with that is our choice. We just use our wisdom and discernment. But we can't make that decision for our neighbor. It's just not simply ours to make. Again, we're responsible for our own. So I'm thankful that we have Isaac where he is now. Yet, I don't feel threatened or uneasy by choices other families around me make. I love that God gives us freedom to make these decisions. I'm not saying anyone has made me feel uneasy about our decision; I just know there can be certain stigmas about education and which way is the "right" way to do it. I know women, myself included, can easily fall into this trap so it's good to keep things real.

Onto other news, we had a bit of a road trip this weekend. It was our first big trip as a family of six. We drove six hours south to LA. Unfortunately the events prompting our road trip were very sad for our family. Steve's aunt passed away a little over a week ago. But when you've got a car full of kids, a road trip, even for a funeral, can still be tons of fun. I wouldn't have said this earlier in my parenting years because road trips then were merely something to be endured. But now that we have two that are a bit older, they've become much more fun. And no it's not because of the DVD player.

All of you can scream and yell all you want but we just DO NOT believe in the DVD player in the car. Don't worry...I won't judge you for doing it. In fact, all of our friends do it and we still love and respect them. Believe it or not, we even have a player in our car that the original owners installed before we bought it. We've just never used it. Not even once. Because we are so old school and stubborn that we want our kids to learn to look out the window and play. There I said it. Shoot me.

Yet that's what they did. And it was glorious. Steve and I got quite a bit of talking done (which was wonderful for me), we listened to a parenting series titled Loving Little Ones by Doug Wilson (excellent by the way) and we laughed a lot. Elliana and Josh also did their share of crying but with the older two in the back laughing, it felt doable. Almost sane. Is that possible? I must admit this was our first road trip of this kind. Even though we still have two little ones, I feel like we're moving past the crazy, everyone is screaming, baby is always hungry, somebody peed their pants kind of road trip...into a fun family adventure (note I said adventure...crazy things still do happen, they're just happening in an overall better context). Thank God. Those were some long years.

The hotel stay was great. The boys got to swim, explore the grounds, jump on the beds and laugh at the phone and TV in the bathroom. It's the simple pleasures. They loved the continental breakfast as well. It wasn't even the most comprehensive one I've ever seen but they thought it was great. We made about three trips over to the lobby to get everyone's food. It was seriously hilarious. While we were getting food, Steve had taken Joshua to go get coffee at Starbucks. So I had everyone else. Believe me, it's easier to have the other three in these type situations. But Ellie decided she didn't like the carrier so instead of letting her scream (she's got a pair of lungs) for everyone else to hear, I simply took her out but then I only had one arm. So Isaac and Caleb helped me heap bagels, yogurts and other treats onto plates and we just took trips. Because there's a lot of us. And we need a bunch of food. And most importantly, because it's FREE! The looks from others cracked me up.

You have to remember we were in Southern California where having even three kids is a bit on the rare side. And that's fine. We're not offended at all. But I do love to see peoples' reactions. One older gentleman said to me, "I sure hope Dad isn't sleeping in right now! (because Steve wasn't there helping with the food)." I grinned widely and replied, "No...he's getting coffee with the other one." The look of incredulity on his face about made me laugh out loud. I had to restrain myself. It was comical. Like I've said before, Steve and I wonder about our sanity sometimes too that we've had four kids in five years. We wouldn't change it but it has been a bit crazy. So we don't fault anyone else for thinking us a little off our rockers. But it does cause for some great laughs here and there. I enjoy that part.

Speaking of Southern California, I learned some new things. First of all, call me naive, but I never knew there was such a rivalry between UCLA and USC. I must say, I picked up on that right away even in the restaurant the night we arrived. All littered throughout BJ's were college sweatshirts from the two schools and many people passing by were talking about the universities like they were the BEST. And they're simply not because everyone knows Cal Poly is but I digress. Not that I was intentionally eaves-dropping but we did have to wait awhile to get seated and I was just sitting nursing the baby.

I was fascinated by this. Even the pastor doing the memorial service mentioned UCLA as the best school (Steve's aunt attended UCLA). Whoa! That's when I knew for sure that the animosity between the schools was not a joke! It's a serious rivalry! As a simple visitor I felt pressured to choose a side. So, on the record, I have to say when pressured into a decision, that I'd have to stick with family loyalty. My mother-in-law went to USC and really, I don't want to let her down. So...Go Trojans! I hope you don't miss Pete Carroll too much and that Lane Kiffen can still lead the Trojans to victory...and hopefully the Rose Bowl (after their two year suspension that is).

I also saw some interesting clothing styles which is normal for Los Angeles. Some were cute. Others weren't. I'm not one for fashion at all. In fact, I've already posted about that here. Yet, sometimes I'm thankful that I'm not given to every fashion whim because some of them are so, so WEIRD. The shredded jeans thing is way beyond me. Can someone please explain it?! I think it looks horrible. I can understand an occasional strategic rip in a pair of jeans that could make them look a bit more appealing sans rip yet...how can a bunch of rips up and down the front of the pant legs be taken seriously at all. Come on. I know I'm usually behind the times on these things but, I know you'll never catch me in a pair of those. No thank you.

Wow...I'm sure rambling and being sassy today. Not sure what's gotten into me. It must be Monday and I just washed and folded five loads of laundry. Yep...that's it.

Anyhow, lastly I mentioned that we went to a memorial. The memorial was for Steve's aunt. I only had the pleasure of meeting her a handful of times but every time I did, she made me feel like I was extremely special and that she had known me for years. That's just the kind of person she was. Needless to say, the service was packed. As in all of the overflow rooms were packed and people were standing in the halls kind of packed to honor her life. The eulogies were beautiful and we were so glad we got to be there.

One of the funniest things I remember about her is that she would always send this same birthday card to Steve's mom year after year. In fact, if I'm remembering correctly, they sent it back and forth to each other. Not sure if that was done in recent years but I remember it being a tradition when Steve and I met. I thought that was so funny and clever. I never had a sister so, I can't necessarily understand the bonds of sisterhood they all shared, but I do know that Mary was loved by both her sisters and will be missed tremendously.

Which brings me to this little peanut. She has mellowed out so much in the past couple of weeks and I'm really just starting to relax and enjoy her. Having her seriously makes me think that maybe, just maybe we should try for a fifth just to give her a chance at having a sister. Because I never had one. And she has three brothers. And maybe it would be worth a try. But then again, it could be another boy and then what would we have accomplished? We would've just made her boy world even larger. Hmmm....we'll have to see about that.

Yet in the meantime, I'm taking every.single.little opportunity to dress her up as much as possible. Because after three boys I deserve it. Ha!

Have a great week and Go Trojans!

And Now...Number 2

I can't believe that I now currently have two little boys in school. Granted, Caleb is attending a little preschool class just one morning a week but, I still find myself wondering where the time has gone. Today was his first day.

Isaac, who just had his first day of school a few weeks ago, got everyone organized this morning and told me that I should take a picture of him and Caleb in their backpacks. You see, all of this first day stuff is "old hat" to him now, so he felt he needed to help me decide what pictures to take! This cracked me up. Of course I obliged him. Josh immediately got our church backpack and asked "Dayda" (Caleb) to help him get it on. He just simply would not be left out.

We got our proverbial first day picture by the door.

One sorta serious.

And another, not so much.

This little goofball just kills me. He's already pretty funny with a lot of spunk and personality. But as he gets older, I just know he's going to be absolutely hilarious. He had to stand by the door too.

Caleb got to be the "special helper" on the first day. He had to help with the weather (pick what the weather conditions were like outside), hold the door at snack time (especially for the girls) and get the mail for the class from the school mailbox. That's my beautiful friend, Allison, who so graciously volunteered her time and house to hold St. Abraham's 3 Year Old Class. She's so creative and talented and look, she can teach five three-year-olds with a baby on her back. Amazing. The class is mostly just for fun. It's just a little introduction to school one morning a week for a short time. Caleb loved it. I noticed a little spring in his step all day. After watching Isaac for two years, he finally got his turn.

It really is a joy for us parents to watch our kids grow up. Yes, it can be a little hard to let go. But watching them step out and do some things on their own really is good.

Well, one morning a week I've only got two...judging by how things went this morning, I think Joshy and I will have a ball. Lots of singing "Wheels on the Bus", building block towers and me trying to sneak in a few minutes of sleep by encouraging cuddling on the couch with "Blankie and Doe".

It's going to be a great year.

Rubbing Elbows

I don't like eating crow. I don't think anybody does. I had just finished having a conversation with my mom about a situation she was dealing with regarding her Realtor (my parents are currently buying a house). She had a definite right to be upset as her Realtor hadn't done what she was supposed to do. However, I was trying to encourage her to keep her eye on the prize--the house. At the end of the conversation we had both come to the conclusion that she just needed to forgive the Realtor for making a mistake.

Fast forward a few hours. I'm busily going about my afternoon and it gets interrupted by a phone call. There's no need to go into details about this phone call. However, at the end of it, I felt like I was smack dab in the middle of a situation just like my mom had been dealing with except it involved me--yes, moi and it felt a little different this time. It's funny how much bigger situations can seem when they're in your world not somebody else's.

Although this person totally had a right to talk with me about the situation, she didn't have all of the facts before calling and as a result, I wasn't doing what she thought I was. Simple as that. I tried to clear it up for her but I still felt annoyed and miffed afterward, no matter how hard I attempted to give her the benefit of the doubt. All of us can relate to these type situations. They happen all of the time. When Steve came home, I told him about it and sought his advice. He gave me some great pointers and then reminded me that even if I am right, I still am not supposed to go all martyr-like on him. People make mistakes and even if they never see their mistake, I still have to forgive them. Hmmmmmmmmmmm...but I don't like to forgive easily. I want to be right. I want to prove my point. I hadn't done anything wrong. Don't I need an apology from them?

A wise woman in our church, who has seen more years than me, has said on more than one occasion when addressing us younger women, that when we're in close community with one another we have to expect that we will rub elbows and it will hurt. We must learn to forgive quickly, seek forgiveness relentlessly and give grace abundantly. That has often stuck with me and keeps coming to my mind when I want to tell myself I still have a reason to be annoyed. Even though this time I was the one who felt I had been "wronged", there will be many times when I will be the one who makes the wrong call, who doesn't check all the facts and hurts somebody else. I need to seek forgiveness then as well.

These situations always dictate an immediate response whether I'm on the receiving end or the giving end. And I don't have a choice. I must choose to forgive. My heart will follow. What it really comes down to, no matter what side of the situation I'm on, is my pride. Either I don't want to seek forgiveness due to pride or I want to be right and be thought of in the correct way.

I should really take a cue from my kids. When one of them whacks the other, the offended will often stand there, with tears streaming down their cheeks, and resolutely say, "I forgive you!" when they are asked. It doesn't take them long. And then they're back at playing together before their tears have even been dried from their eyes. Why can't I be like that? When I don't forgive quickly it makes me feel bad. Isn't it better to get it over with and be back in fellowship? Dragging it out due to wanting to be right, just makes it worse for me. Do I really want to be a glutton for punishment over something so silly?

I'm older and I know better. Yet I still struggle with forgiveness more than them and often it's over very small things. Maybe that's why Jesus said that if one wants to enter the kingdom he has to become like a little child. For all that we're supposed to be teaching them, we get quite a bit of learning done ourselves.

Rubbing elbows hurts. But at least we're in close contact with others. That's a blessing. So as much as it hurts sometimes, we must take the good with the bad, seek truth, forgive quickly and completely. If only I could apply that to every situation I come up against. I can try. And when I need help, I'll be getting daily examples from the little ones...enough to keep my head on straight and my heart humbled. Enter like a child--like a precious, impulsive, loves-without-abandon little child. Only then can we see the depths of the kingdom of God.

Zucchini What?

Many of you may remember that we've had an abundance of zucchinis (I've already posted this pic!). In an effort to use them and not let them go to waste, I've been trying to come up with a bunch of different things I could make with them besides Zucchini Bread. Of course we've been giving them away as well, but my neighbors can only use so many and we have TONS! I've come across a few recipes that I've tried that have been okay. Sorry Dad...the Kolokithopita (Greek Zucchini Pie) wasn't a hit here. I ate it though but I guess I'm the only real Greek in the house. Nevertheless, I've also found some winners. So if you've got an abundance of zucchini...you should check this recipe out.

Of course, it's from King Arthur Flour. I'm sorry...I really am stuck in my ways. I don't deviate from the favorites too much--King Arthur Flour is just simply one of the best! I wish I could say that my kids like this meal but they don't. However, they still have to eat a few mandatory bites each week. Now my husband, they're his new favorite dinner and he even eats them for breakfast heated up in the toaster. Slap some butter on them and they're good to go. I don't cook for my kids anyway. If they like what I make, great. Of course I love that. Yet if not, I just remind myself that I'm cooking for an audience of one--the husband, my best friend, my favorite. Once the kids get older, they'll learn to like good food!

So without further ado, I give you the best Zucchini Pancake recipe I've found. They're simply delicious and really easy to make.

Zucchini Pancakes
King Arthur Flour
Serves 6

4 cups grated zucchini (doesn't need to be drained or anything)
1 cup freshly grated parmesan
1 cup freshly grated cheese (cheddar, jack or any kind that sounds good)
4 eggs, beaten
1/4 cup olive or vegetable oil
2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper
1/4 cup chopped chives or onion
1 tbsp fresh basil (1 tsp dried)
1 tbsp fresh oregano (1 tsp dried)
1 1/2 to 2 cups flour

Grate zucchini and cheese.

In a mixing bowl, beat the eggs and oil until light. Beat in the salt and pepper. Blend in the chives or onion, herbs, zucchini and cheese. Add enough flour to hold the mixture together.

Heat a griddle until it is moderately hot and grease it lightly. Drop the batter into the hot pan by the 1/4 cupful and brown the pancakes on both sides. Serve them as soon as they're done or keep them warm in the oven.

It's really nice if you have all of the herbs and chives in your garden. I happen to and the fresh herbs really do taste great. But I've done it with dried as well and they're still really, really good! I get everything ready and then just throw them together right before dinner. Amazing. I hope you enjoy them.